11:59 p.m. - Sun 8.29.2010
That happens to me a lot.
I've - slowly - started "lightening the load" before moving; I've taken a number of things out to the lobby's "giveaway area" (In some cases, returning things I grabbed from the "giveaway area" in the first place), and made a number of trips out to the trash.
In my last entry, I mentioned my "hoarding"? Well, cleaning out my desk, I realized that one thing I really hold onto is paper (I was particularly struck by a half-dozen or so cards congratulating me on my 40th birthday...which was nine years ago).
In addition to nearly decade-old birthday cards, I found bank statements for my old Washington Mutual account, booklets explaining long-ago 401-Ks and health insurance plans, receipts for car repairs for my old Chevy Corsica, and the set of California maps I got when I first signed up with AAA (Prior to making my big cross-country move to LA).
There were seven boxes of greetings cards - two boxes of "Thank You" cards,
The trap of going through this stuff is that it can become a time-wasting "nostalgia fest" - In addition to the aforementioned items, there were some photos, and old resumes, and multiple copies of old reviews from shows I did in Lansing (Not sure why I made dozens of copies of those reviews - what exactly did I think I was going to do with them?) - but I think I did pretty well, all things considered, with quickly pulling out the things I wanted/needed, and dumping the things that were long overdue for "the circular file").
Mon 8/30/10 (3:53 pm)
Just got off the phone with the gas company...
And before that, I was on the phone with AT&T.
And before AT&T, I was on the phone with the electric company.
I couldn't complete my business with the electric company over the phone, because apparently the previous occupant didn't pay their bill the past couple months, so I have to go down in person and prove that I'm me, and not just "Previous Occupant" running a scam.
Anyway, I'm feeling fiscally stressed - everyone seems to want "deposits" and "set-up fees" and what-have-you - but what can you do? I just have to tell myself, "It'll work out, Jim...and if you're not going to actually save any money moving (Not in the immediate future, anyway), which was kind of the goal, at least you'll have parking".
Since I'm not going to group tonight - Or ever again (I quit last week) - and since I now have a parking spot of my very own, I could theoretically take some clothes to Goodwill, or take the crate of cds and dvds I culled from my collection to Amoeba (To try and make a little money)...but I think it would be easier to wait till tomorrow morning, when I could do that, and hit the electric company, before going to see The Girl Who Played With Fire with my friend Howard at the Sunset V (I was prepared to start taking things over to the new apartment today...but was asked if I could hold off till tomorrow, because they're still doing some work, hooking up appliances and changing some fixtures and such).
(Just writing about this is making me feel anxious - "It's all going to work out, Jim. You're going to be fine...")
So, as I mentioned, I quit group...which to be honest, was starting to feel inevitable, less a question of "If" than "When".
Beyond just really disliking a particular member of the group, and not wanting to deal anymore, my decision to quit is basically because I don't think I have much to offer this group...and probably more to the point, I don't think this group has much to offer me.
(And I really think I'm going to need to elaborate on this later, but right now, I'm feeling guilty that doing this means not doing something that involves moving...)
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