11:29 am - Sat 1/29/05
A Little Bit Of This, A Little Bit Of That

Thurs 1/27/05 (11:30 p.m.)

I've been pretty up-and-down emotionally over the past couple days...

Had a dentist appointment yesterday, to get a permanent filling for my last root canal tooth. No big deal, really (The 45 minute wait annoyed me more than the actual procedure).

The next chapter in my dental odyssey will involve going to this place in Pasadena for photographs, a "tracing", and a "Cephalometric Profile" (I have no idea what a "Cephalometric Profile" is, but it sounds very impressive, doesn't it? And the mental image I have of getting "traced" involves them doing a chalk outline around my head, though for the life of me, I can' t figure out how that'll help them fit me for braces).

As I've said before, I'm feeling a bit of anxiety about the money involved here�Okay, more than "a bit", really�but I really feel like I need to get this done (No matter how you slice it, it's gonna be tough, but I've decided to put anything I can't pay for outright on credit cards; it would actually be cheaper than the astronomical, "Tony Soprano"-ish interest rate the finance company's charging me).

While I was at the dentist office, I saw the first news reports about the train crash in Glendale that killed 11 people and wounded almost 200.

A supposedly "suicidal" man parked his SUV on the tracks (I say "supposedly", because he bailed out at the last second), and when the commuter train hit the vehicle, it derailed, but was still moving forward when it hit another train coming the opposite way, on the next tracks over.

Now "Suicidal Guy" is up for 11 counts of murder, and will likely face the death penalty.

And all I can think is "Too bad they can't kill him 11 times over...".

Even though I haven't had any auditions the past two days, I have been trying, in my fashion, to make things happen.

Yesterday, I checked the listings in Backstage, L.A. Casting, and Actors Access (Coming up with exactly one thing I wanted to submit for). I also signed up for that second Notary Public class, "Hands On/Legal Forms and How To Increase Income" (Optimistically presuming I'm going to pass the initial, pre-requisite course next month).

And today I went to Studio City to pick up a tape of the Hyundai commercial I did this past year (More on how that came about later). Then I went to Cinema Prints to get new headshots printed up (Which would have worked out better if I had actually had the cd the headshots were on; I'd left it in my computer at home, and all I had with me was the empty case). And I finished the day at the post office, sending a tape out to Red Tettemer, the ad agency responsible for the Time-Warner Cable "Dish Police" commercial (Aysia seeing the spot on tv has whetted my appetite to see the spot with my own two eyes).

Fri 1/28/05 (2:31 p.m.)

Where was I...?

The Hyundai commercial tape I picked up yesterday is much better than I had anticipated. What I saw on tv was very short--maybe 15 seconds�and frankly, pretty disappointing, considering how tremendously difficult the shoot had been. But on the tape there are two additional cuts of the spot that are longer (And in my humble opinion, better). I don't know if those "longer cuts" actually aired or not, but for my purposes, it doesn't really matter�I just want physical evidence that I've acted in front of a camera.

I ended up getting a copy of the commercial because I ran into an actress�Emily P.-- who had also been in the commercial, though on a different shoot day (At the end of the spot, there's a "long shot" of a family loading up the vehicle for an outing; Emily was the "Mom").

We read together at the Nissan audition, and both got callbacks. And it was at the callback when we pieced together that we'd both been in the Hyundai spot; afterwards, she ended up with two copies, and when she heard I didn't have one, she offered one of hers (Kind of funny, now that I think about it�Emily was just a body in the far distance, and she ends up with two copies of the commercial, while I'm the "hero" in the piece, and I didn't even ask for a copy).

As I talked to Emily at the callback, I felt a definite attraction. She was pretty and age-appropriate�I'm guessing mid-to-late 30s�and the conversation was easy, and that's pretty much all I need to get me thinking "I wonder if there's something there...?".

She gave me her cellphone number, but when I called and left a message (Asking how she wanted to work my getting the tape), she called back, leaving a message that she would leave it at the "guard station" (She lives with her grandfather in a "gated community").

I found that discouraging�I'd hoped she might suggest getting together for lunch or something. At worst, I thought it would be an excuse to see her again, and I could take things from there�and I took it as a sign of her lack-of-interest (Of course, I guess it's possible she had been waiting for me to make the overture, but that seems doubtful).

When we talked at the callback, she said she was planning to give up L.A. and go back home in the next couple months (She's been here for eight years, and currently lives with her grandfather in a gated community in Studio City, an arrangement she described as "not good").

I'm pretty shy about asking women out, what with the not being good-looking or having any money (And the not having had sex in over a decade, and the keeping house like a crack addict), and the fact that she's planning on leaving in the next couple months added to my "What's the point?" feelings (Honestly? Even if she were to stay, I'd see her state of "burned out-ness" as problematic; I think I'd be much more likely to sink to her level of jaded-ness than she would be to rise to my level of (relative) hopefulness).

Sun 1/30/05 (9:52 a.m.)

Went to the bar last night after work, to see off Erin (Who was done on Friday) and Amy D. (Whose last day is Tuesday).

The bar�St Nicks, down on 3rd-- was very crowded, very loud, and very young (I was very possibly the oldest person in the place). And I really had just wanted to go home after a long day of work, but I thought I should go.

(And Joe "sweetened the deal" when he offered to buy me a round, and split a cab with me on the way home; the round ended up being three rounds�Joe's Irish, you see, and apparently doesn't like to drink alone�and he also paid most of the cabfare.)

I talked to people a little bit�Mostly to Matt (Who worked at the store over the holidays), and Adam, Amy's husband, who's an editor on a reality show I don't remember right now (Not one of the big ones)�but all-in-all, it was the kind of outing that made me wish I'd just gone home right after work.

(When I think I should "make an appearance" at a thing, it usually turns out that that I really wouldn't have been missed, and needn't have bothered.)

I'm trying to think if there's any big news I've left out...

Well, here's something I'm probably more ambivalent about than I should be�Got a call recently from "Brian", who used to work at the bookstore (Not Brian K., the actor guy, but I think Brian, the African-American guy who wants to be a director), wanting to guage my interest in being in a film he's doing.
I should be excited, huh?

I'm kinda not, though. All I find myself thinking about is the "not making money" part of the equation (And not just "not making money", but potentially losing money, if I have to "book out" with JS for too long a time).

But...I need more "tape", I need more on-camera experience, I need to act, and who knows? Maybe Brian ends up being the next Spike Lee, and I'll be his "John Turturro" (Or, more likely at my age, his "Danny Aiello").

It could happen.

Just got off the phone to Cary, who is a manager at Peoplesoft.

Oracle recently took over Peoplesoft, after a lengthy battle, and laid off some 5000 people.

And happily, Cary was not amongst amongst the fallen (It's still tough, though�While Cary and his group were spared, lots of people he knows were not).

I've been sort of following this Oracle/Peoplesoft story for awhile, and am glad it didn't end with Cary having to scramble for a new job.

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