10:13 am - Tues 3/6/07
So "yay!" for me.
(At callbacks, the rule typically is to not change what got you to the callback in the first place. So when I got there on Thursday, I was mentally prepared to just do what I did before, and let the chips fall where they might. And that being the case, I was a little "thrown"--more than I should have been, really--when the director started giving direction very different from what I'd done initially. But "thrown" as I might have felt, I guess I was doing better than I realized, because here I am, in serious contention for the gig. But anyway...)
This would be a really nice one to get--another national (I believe), with a little bit of "acting" thrown in, just the way I like it--but as I write this, I'm having a serious case of "No News Is BAD News"-itis (Cause JS said he expected to know one-way-or-another "in the next three hours", and "three hours" has now become twenty-four); I've been feeling like I need to get this posted quickly, before I get the call that I didn't get it, and the "avail" becomes "anti-climactic" instead of "exciting".
(In the spot, I'm "Vladimir", a strange-but-helpful foreigner of indeterminate origin, who has just helped a woman through natural childbirth; her husband arrives late and misses the blessed event, you see, because he didn't get his car serviced at Jiffy Lube, and he ended up stuck on the side of the road. Which reminds me--I'm overdue for an oil change myself...)
Anyway, I'll let you know when I know (When you get an "avail" for a job, typically you either get it, or they "release" you, which means you didn't get it).
For a solid week--from the Friday after the Comcast shoot to this past Friday--I had an audition or callback every day (Except on Sunday. But Sundays don't count, cause you never have auditions on Sunday).
I'm not sure, but I think I'd have to go back a couple years to find such a busy week for auditions.
And now that we've had a little break--Friday's audition was a weird, "artsy" spot for Lexus--I wouldn't mind if the busy pace resumed until such time as I actually book another gig.
I'm running hot-and-cold on workshops these days.
On the "hot" side, as I think I've said before, I've been feeling really good, both about the quality of scenes I've been getting, and what I've been doing with them. I can pretty consistently take whatever I'm given, if there's anything actually there, and run with it.
I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing.
Which brings me to the "cold" side...
When I keep "bringing the heat" like I've been doing, it starts to become frustrating to see little to no return for my time, effort, money, and heat-bringing.
But that's basically "the name of the game"--You have to throw a lot of "heat" in order to get anything in return.
And you have to have faith that if you keep "knocking it out of the ballpark" each time you get in front of people ("What's up with the baseball metaphors, Jim...?"), eventually things will start to happen (And I know--things actually have started to happen. But sue me--I want more. And I want it now).
I find myself feeling pretty simpatico with Jen C. in that regard...
Jen had a crazy good year last year, booking ten co-star roles (Prior to 2006, she had one co-star on her resume, for The Shield, so she went from zero to sixty in a hurry).
Cut to this year; To date, she's had ten or so theatrical auditions (I've had two), and booked nothing. And it's making her a little crazy--it's a "streaky" biz, but you can't help but wonder, and worry, about why you were so "hot" then but are so "cold" now.
But it's hard to talk about it with someone who, say, hasn't booked their first co-star role yet. All they want to say is "Shut up! You've booked ten co-stars!" (Or two national commercials, in my case).
But the thing is, it's a career, not a "hobby" or a "sideline". And in order for it to be a career, you have to keep working, you have to make progress, you have to make money.
What are you supposed to do after you've started to have a little success? How are you supposed to feel?
For myself, I'm happy I've made progress--It's pretty cool that, thanks to the commercials I've booked, money is not really an "issue" for me right now--but that happiness doesn't preclude me from wanting more.
Cause what am I supposed to do? Say "Well, I've booked a couple co-stars and a few national commercials, so now I'm all set"?
I'm not "all set".
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