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2:49 pm - Wed 11/27/02
\"Hey, aren't you that Staples guy...?\"
(Offline, earlier today...)

"Hey, aren't you the guy in that Staples commercial...?

"Remember what I said about wanting to "take a big pile of money out for a test drive"...? Well, I may be getting the chance to do just that, sooner than I ever imagined!

This is going to be "old news" to a number of people, but on Monday, I got a message from JS, saying that I had a callback for the Staples commercial!!!

YEEEEE-HAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

(So I guess when the casting director said "Good. That was very good", he wasn't just bullshitting me after all! Go figure...)

The callback is this coming Monday, at noon. So if you can spare a little time and emotional/mental/spiritual energy, please pray, light a candle, chant, sacrifice a chicken, or if you lack a particular religious ritual for this sort of thing, just think a good thought or two for my success. I'd really appreciate it (Some people think it's bad luck to tell lots of people about something like this, that you'll "jinx" it. But I'm choosing to believe something else--If you put your dream out there and have the positive energy of a lot of people on your side, something good is bound to happen).

If/when I get the gig, I'll be in New York City from the 6th through the 11th, shooting a commercial and a print ad (Just the idea of going to New York to shoot a commercial is pretty damned exciting! And the company springs for everything--First class plane fare, hotel, etc--so from my perspective, it would be like a five-day "working vacation").

I know it could be just coincidence--the right look for the right commercial--but be that as it may, I'm gratified that the first commercial I went to where I had lines, where I had something to do, where I had the chance to come in with something, is also the first commercial where I've gotten a callback. It's hugely encouraging; Even if this one doesn't happen for me, it tells me that another one somewhere down the road will (And depending on who you ask, it takes anywhere from 100 to 300 auditions before booking a gig. So I'd love if I got something on just my sixth try out-of-the-gate). It reassures me that I really can make it out here. I haven't just been indulging a fantasy.

(In a bizarre way, it's even oddly reassuring that I got the callback when I thought I'd blown it; Makes me feel like anything could happen once I start showing them my "A" game!)

I'm trying not to get ahead of myself here, because I don't have the gig yet, and I have no idea how much money is involved, but I can't help but think about what I'll do if/when the gravy train starts rolling in.

The first order of business will be to bank at least $1300; My understanding is that you get to do one union job without being in the union, but after that, you have to sign up (The $1300 is, I believe, the cost of signing up and the first six months dues. Or something like that).

After that, I'd want to pay off my credit card bills, and send a big fat check to Mark and Jane for the car loan (I don't think they're tapping their collective feet or anything like that, but it bothers me that I've only been able to pay them back in dribs and drabs).

Beyond putting something away and paying off my debts, I'm not sure what else I'd do (I'm not going to rush out and buy that Mini Cooper. Not yet anyway; At this point, I have a car, and I think the money could be better spent elsewhere). It kind of depends on how much money we're talking about, and how it's disbursed (My understanding, vague as it is, is that you receive an initial "session fee", and then residuals. I don't know how the print ad ties in with that. But JS said it would be a "very good gig").

I could probably start shopping around for acting classes. And again, depending on how much money we're talking about here, I might even be able to consider leaving the bookstore, or at least going down to part-time.

I want to tell myself not to even think about this stuff, but how can I not?

I know it sounds like I'm obsessing over the money aspect here--especially after my last entry (And however much money this would be, it's guaranteed to be more money than I've ever made in my life, for doing anything)--but while at the bookstore yesterday, a thought popped into my head, a thought that cuts to the heart of my being here; I might fantasize about fame and fortune, but what I'm really looking for is the chance to be comfortable, the chance to feel good doing what it is I think I'm here on Earth to do.

I want to be somewhere and feel like "I'm home". I want to feel like "This is what I do, I love doing it, and I'm so good at it people pay me to do it".

That's what I want. And I don't want to make this Staples thing bigger than it is, but just the callback has reminded me that I'm not just dreaming here; I came out here to make something happen, and it's actually going to happen.

I'm making it happen.

(END)

Okay, if this isn't the textbook definition of "black comedy", I don't know what is...

I wrote that entry a few hours ago (My internet connection was acting funky, so I ended up copying it to Lotus to put in here later).

Right after I wrote the entry, I was about to lie down, and I decided to check my voicemail.

There was a message from JS.

He'd gotten a call from Lien/Cowan, the casting agency where I did the audition.

Staples called them today. The spot is cancelled.

Isn't that funny?

I'm laughing, anyway...

 

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