9:23 am - Mon 3.22.2010
The Acting Food Chain

(Hard to sort out everything that's going on in my head, so I'm going to write as quickly as possible, and see what happens...)

Happy health care reform passed (In the House) - I would have been happy it passed just because it's been needed for a long time (The system is clearly broken), but the far-right (Who now seem to basically be the Republican party, instead of just a wacko contingent) spewed enough anger and ignorance and downright hatred over the issue that I'm just happy their stupidity and fear-mongering (And the latter from a lot of clearly cynical,calculating people who knew better) didn't win the day.

It's just nice, every so often, when "the good guys" win...and in this case, it's a "win" that actually matters.

I told Bette on Saturday, "It's frustrating that, no matter how hard I try, my emotional state still almost completely hinges on how the acting stuff is or isn't going - If I have a lot of auditions and I'm booking gigs, I feel good, and if not, I struggle".

(Okay - It's a little more "involved" than that...but not much.)

So "the bad news"? It's been slow.

But "the good news" within "the bad news"? In my first couple auditions this year, I booked Castle.

And while I've only had two commercial auditions so far this month - and no theatrical - I got callbacks for both of them.

(I had a callback for the Land Rover Internet spot on Thursday - at this point, I'm assuming it didn't happen, though I was in serious contention for it while I was in the room - and I have a callback for Bing this afternoon in Santa Monica.)

A short time ago, JS passed along another bummer note from a theatrical agency about "the state of the business" (JS is a commercial agent, but has also had experience as a casting director, and has clients asking him for his advice and opinions on "The Business" all the time).

I considered deleting it right away, because I don't think I need help when it comes to feeling anxious about my career prospects.

But I did read it, because I shouldn't have my head in the sand about what I'm up against.

The basic message was that fewer pilots are being made, and more and more movie "names" are flocking to them - Not to mention already established TV stars - so if you're a working actor who was hoping to get your "shot" at a pilot this season, forget it.

They weren't really talking about me here - as a middle-aged character actor with nothing but co-star credits, no one's looking to make me a series regular - but there's a "trickle down" effect, as everyone takes a step down on "the acting food chain" (As name actors who didn't get pilots compete for guest-star roles, working actors who were getting guest-stars will be competing with Yours Truly for the co-star stuff).

So this may not be my year to step up to "Guest Star" status.

But I'm not going to rule out some amazing, miraculous turn-of-events.

Cause if the door's open just a crack, I might be able to slip through...after all, I've lost a lot of weight in recent years.

(Well, I told myself I was going to write quickly, and promptly bogged down...and now I need to catch a nap before this afternoon's callback (It would be nice to book this Bing thing, to keep the bill-paying, food-buying fun going for awhile).

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