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10:10 am - Sunday, Mar. 16, 2003
The Acting Thing

The Acting Thing

This past Tuesday, I finally sent something to Personal Journaling magazine (A heavily-edited version of the "Dancin'" entry here in Diaryland).

I don't know why I waited so long, but I was really glad I finally did it. Contrary to what I'd thought going in, it was more involved than just printing out something I'd already written; I spent about an hour editing and re-writing. But for the opportunity to be published (And make $100 in the bargain), an hour's work doesn't seem like too big a deal.

(I won't hear from them unless they're going to put it in the magazine, but I'm not going to stop with the one submission. With over 500 entries here in Diaryland, not to mention my pre-Diaryland journals, I feel like there has to be something they'll go for, and I'm going to find it! And I'm still thinking about trying to write an essay on "The Journaling Life"--probably something about online journaling-- which would pay $200.)

I have an audition Monday morning for GM, for the part of a hypnotist.

It may sound counter-intuitive, but it's occurred to me that the thing to do with these auditions, the ones where I don't really know anything till I go in, is to not give them a lot of thought until I go in. And it makes sense; If the sides are available, if there's an opportunity to prepare, then you prepare, but if not, you can't have a bunch of set ideas about what the spot is going to be like and what you're going to do, because then you'll just go in and be thrown when the spot is nothing at all like you'd envisioned (At least that's how it's worked for me so far). You just have to go in and be open, prepared to have fun with whatever's presented to you.

I really need a theatrical agent. I just don't see how I'm going to get from "here" to "there" without one. But at this point, I don't have anything to sell myself to an agent with--No show he can come see me in, no reel, no commercial, no union membership, nothing--so it feels like a mass-mailing to agents would be a waste of postage (And the consensus seems to be that that's pretty pointless anyway. What you're supposed to do, according to Brad "The Business of Acting" Lemack, is target a handful of agencies, and periodically update them on your progress).

A good thing to happen at this point would be if I got a commercial (Or maybe even two commercials); I'd become SAG (Or at least "SAG-eligible"), I'd have money for classes (Which continue to loom as a very big deal), I'd maybe have something to put on a reel, and it would be a major psychological boost.

Here's a run-down of my acting efforts so far this year:

1. I've sent out 27 headshots.

2. I've auditioned for two plays (Cesar & Ruben and The Chalky White Substance).

3. I've auditioned for three student films (And was cast in Missing Breath, which was shot last month and should be finished in May).

4. As of Monday, I'll have had 11 commercial auditions (And I've gotten two callbacks, one of which I missed, to my lasting chagrin).

The fact that I've had so many commercial auditions and so little of anything else is one of the big reasons I'm feeling a powerful need for a theatrical agent; Often, I feel like if I'd had 11 auditions for small movie or television roles, I might very well have gotten something by now.

But anyway, I feel like I'm "putting it out there"--I think that's apparent--and still not doing enough somehow. But I feel stymied; How do I take classes with no money? If I worked during the day to do plays at night, what would happen with the commercial auditions? How do I get an agent, so I can get more (And better) auditions, if an agent isn't interested in me until I have decent credits to show him?

I guess the thing I should be thinking about at this point is just trying to act.

And in the meantime, figuring out how to make my life work over and above, and around, "the acting thing".


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