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9:15 AM - Tues 12.28.21
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"Betwixtmas

I just learned the week between Xmas and New Year now has a name.

Betwixtmas.

I like it.

As I've said in here many, many times before, with no family and few friends, usually working retail/customer service jobs (Where the "holiday" just meant an unpaid day off) and now being unemployed altogether (So "days off" are moot), the holidays don't mean much to me.

I'm not saying I don't get anything from them (Even if I feel guilty about it, I like a nice holiday meal - If I have somewhere to go on the day - I enjoy Xmas carols, I get "gift boxes" from my two Janes that are fun, etc). But it's a time fraught with emotional peril, where I can wrestle with loneliness, depression, guilt, anxiety, and general existential angst.

And most of all, it's a time where the overriding interest in my life - "The Biz" - goes on holiday, for at least the last two weeks of the year (Which I always refer to as "The year ending before it ends").

I know it's not emotionally healthy or helpful to feel this way, but I often wish I could just close my eyes, mid-December, and wake up in the first week of January, to skip this time where "nothing happens" and just "get back to work".

This is why it struck me yesterday that, if I've been white-knuckling the season, just waiting for it to be over so I can "get back to work", that could be a recipe for a big letdown come the new year - There's no law that says auditions and gigs are going to start coming in fast and furious on January 3rd.

(And if you've wondered if it's wise of me to make "The Biz" the "overriding interest in my life"...I have wondered that as well. But here we are.)

I will say, I was very busy the first two weeks of the month, and came close on a couple of things (being availed for a commercial, and having Casting ask to see my reel after I auditioned for a network TOS guest-star). So if I can keep that up (And if circumstances send some auditions my way early on in the New Year), I feel like there's a chance I will get off to a fast start in 2022.

And while the auditions and near-misses stopped mid-month, one nice acting-adjacent (And money-making) thing that happened next was I got a boatload of Cameos and Memmos (8 in all, a number of which were "express", which meant I earned a premium for getting them done in 24 hours).

And a new thing that's started happening just this year - I sold two of my drawings (As I've joked in here before, it's making me wish I'd worked harder on drawing and "gone public" as an "artist" years ago).

While I wouldn't say it's the same thing as booking gigs and making money as an actor...it's pretty cool (Though I suspect the Cameo/Memmo thing is going to fade, sooner rather than later - It amused me recently when I thought, "I have to get on a new show if I want to keep this video thing going...!").

Well, feels like there's loads more to say, but this has taken me hours - as it does - and I've been trying to get myself to a matinee at the Los Feliz 3 since Xmas day, so I'm gonna call it here.

Till next time...


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