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12:24 am - Tues 6.17.2008 (WARNING: This entry contains adult language and themes...but mostly adult language. Anyway, you get the idea.) Went to Jen and Molly�s again on Saturday night (Apparently, they invite people to their weekly Sunday dinner, and now I�m on the guest list. But since this Sunday was Father�s Day, Sunday dinner was on Saturday this week. Cause I guess some people have fathers or something, and might have other plans on Sunday. But anyway...). I�d gotten off the Metro at the North Hollywood station, and was walking to their place (Which is a mile, maybe a mile-and-a-half away), carrying a 12-pack of Diet Coke in one of my cloth shopping bags. I�d gotten just a few blocks from the station when I passed a young African American gentleman, accompanied by a Latino woman I assume was his girlfriend. We were walking in the same direction, and as I overtook them, I glanced in their direction, as I will do sometimes (What can I say? I�ve got eyes, and I likes to use them). Well, apparently the gentleman had an aversion to being glanced at; when I got five or ten yards past them, I heard him angrily say - as if addressing his girl, but loud enough for me to hear - �(something something) looking at me, big-headed motherfucker!�. Now, I guess he could have been referring to someone else. Cause who knows? Maybe a big-headed motherfucker had looked at him earlier in the day, and he needed his girl to help him through the resulting post-traumatic stress. But since I�m a big-headed motherfucker, and had just looked at him seconds before, I assumed he was talking about me. Part of me wanted to turn around and say, �Are you talking to me? Are you talking to me? I don�t see any other big-headed motherfuckers standing here, so you must be talking to me...� But I didn�t know if he�d get the reference (Especially since I don�t do impressions). And generally, my sense of humor is wasted on stupid people anyway. I was tempted to say, �Okay, I�ll give you the �big-headed� part. But Dude - I don�t even have a mother�. But again, I just didn�t have a sense he�d appreciate my self-deprecating wit (Besides, he didn�t need to know my family history - we�d just met, after all). (An aside: When someone calls you a �motherfucker�, what does it actually mean? Is the insult that you go around fucking other people�s mothers, or that you like to fuck your own mother? Cause to me, the suggestion that you�re involved in an incestuous relationship with your own mother is the more insulting one, but maybe that�s just me. Anyway...) The angrier part of me wanted to be less polite - �Hey shithead, if you don�t like being looked at, why don�t you put a fucking bag over your head? You�d be doing the world a favor.� - suggesting he was unpleasant to look at. But I really had just glanced at him for a second, and how stupid would I have felt, if I�d gotten mid-way into my insult and realized he was actually a very attractive man? The really angry part of me (�Psycho Jim�), the part that really doesn�t enjoy taking shit from people, wanted to say, �Man, you�re going to be so embarrassed when I kick your fucking ass right in front of your hoochie girlfriend...�. You see, �Psycho Jim� doesn�t take this sort of confrontation well. But fortunately, there�s a bigger part of me that�s a major-league pussy, and remembers I don�t know how to fight (�Psycho Jim� would be promising a major-league beatdown that he, in all likelihood, could never deliver). So I just kept walking, wondering if Mr �I don�t like big-headed motherfuckers looking at me when I�m walking with my girl� was going to try to escalate things at some point. He didn�t. But I still spent the rest of what was now seeming like a very long walk nervously checking my weaponry (I had pepper spray and a pocket knife on my person, but I�ve never used either in actual �fight conditions�), preparing for a rear attack that never came. Interesting note (Interesting to me, anyway); Afterwards, I was angrily thinking of this as a �racial incident�, but then it hit me - he didn�t call me a �big-headed white motherfucker� (Not that I heard, anyway). Maybe he just didn�t like big-headed motherfuckers looking at him. And really, who does?
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