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2:27 pm - Monday, Jan. 30, 2006
Working \"The Dome\"

Working “The Dome”

Mon 1/30/06 (10:46 a.m.)

Feeling a little regret/remorse over my last entry–I do every time I reveal too much of my “down side”–but I’ll get over it.

Last night at work, I had a short shift in “The Dome”, working the snack bar. It was very slow, because Annapolis, the movie playing there, is turning out to be a major dud (Audiences in the low double-digits look pretty sad in a theater that seats 826).

(I’ve seen maybe a half-hour or so of the movie–Starring James Franco--watching it during breaks; it’s not really terrible, it just doesn’t have much reason to exist. It’s basically a very bland hybrid of Top Gun and Officer And A Gentleman.)

It was a nice night, screwing around, chatting with coworkers, waiting on the occasional “guest”.
Not the kind of night that makes the bosses happy, I wouldn’t think, but to my way of thinking, it somewhat “balanced out” the day before, when I was so unhappy and frustrated (At the Zone 2 snack bar) that I started having the urge to hit myself (Something I will do sometimes when I’m highly agitated. Though so far, I’ve managed to refrain from doing it in public).

And at the end of the night last night–I was done at 11:30–Keisha, who was closing, gave me a couple hotdogs and sausage baguettes to take home (We’re not supposed to take stuff, even if it’s the last set and it’s going to be “wasted”. It was the same deal at the bookstore, with the cafe, and it’s taken me this long to figure out why management would give a rat’s ass–If they said it was okay to take home food that was otherwise going to be thrown away, then people might over-stock things on purpose, hoping they’d be “wasted” at the end of the night. That’s the best rationale I can up with, anyway, for why a company would have a policy that it’s better to throw perfectly good food in the garbage than give it to your underpaid employees).

(I gave one of the sausage baguettes to a homeless guy on the way home. He seemed happy to get it.)

My last paycheck, this past Thursday, was $406 and change, for 60 hours (For the record, that’s five hours less than a comparable check at Borders would have been. Though without any of the payroll deductions I had at Borders–heath insurance, dental, 401K–it’s about the same amount of take-home). I worked six hours this past Wednesday, typically a day off, but I think that’ll be on the next paycheck.

This whole thing’s got me wondering if I need to rethink that “Not wanting to make myself available for six days a week” policy...

It’s also got me wondering if I need to maybe look into going back to Borders (Not my old Borders; the one down the block from the theater). I kinda/sorta/really don’t want to–Actually, forget “kinda” and “sorta”. I just really don’t want to- but maybe it’s “any port in a storm” time.

(What I’m thinking is that I could make myself available to work there weekday nights and Sunday during the day–I’d want to have Saturdays off for casting workshops–and be available to the theater weekend evenings; I’d want to continue at the theater, because in addition to needing the money, now that I can see movies for free, I really don’t want to give that up.)

(12:59 pm)

Just got back from depositing my check at Wells Fargo (Found a dollar on the way home, which is now resting comfortably in my wallet).

I’m hoping the rest of my work week will be fairly painless–I’m working in the Zone 2 snack bar tonite, from 6:00-11:30, then learning how to do Box Office from 6:00-11:00 tomorrow (Till now, my time at the theater has primarily alternated between ushering and snack bar).

I feel like I don’t want very much out of life right this minute–Just the ability to pay my rent and bills, a commercial audition and/or a casting workshop to feel hopeful about, a relatively easy time at the theater, and maybe something good to watch on television.

But beyond this minute, I want to work this year. I want to act.

I want to get more tv work (And I want it to actually air).

I want to book at least one film.

I want to book at least one national commercial.

And I want to get a theatrical agent. A good one.

And I want at least some of the work I get to be meaningful to me. To be something I can be proud of, that feels like I’m actually “acting”, and that helps me get more work.

I want to make enough money to pay back Mark & Jane, and Cary & Kay, to pay down my credit card bills, to pay for a gym membership at 24 Hour Fitness (Another good reason not to quit ArcLight altogether–they pay the initial startup fee), to pay for straightening my teeth, to afford to take an acting class and/or pay for more workshops/showcases, and to just provide me some “breathing room” where I don’t feel sick to my stomach when the rent comes due.

That’s what I want this year.

That, and a girlfriend.

I guess that's enough for now...


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