2:10 pm - Fri 11/28/03
Anyone know a good mood-regulating drugI could get on?

Fri 11/28/03 (11:25 p.m.)

I didn't mention it in my last entry, and maybe I should have, but I did spend some time yesterday thinking about things I had to feel "thankful" for.

One thing on the list is that I'm coming off a three-day "weekend", which is a very rare occurrence indeed; Thanksgiving is a paid holiday�and other than Xmas, the only day the store is closed--but since Borders doesn't want to lay out the extra "green" for that, they instead cut back on hours, so they aren't putting out any extra payroll.

In the past, they've just cut an hour here and a hour there, which you hardly notice, and which has always annoyed me; I mean, I know they don't want to pay me any more than they have to�I think they're unhappy about having to pay me at all, truth be told-- but at least give me something that means something to me in return...like an extra day off.

And this year, they did.

Another thing I've been thankful for is the rush of auditions this month.

As I told Jane in an email recently, I'm feeling "white-hot" right now; in addition to booking the Incubus video, I've gotten three callbacks from a total of eight auditions (A ninth audition, for Sega, was "straight-to-callback"). And so far as I know, I could still get callbacks from three of the four other auditions; the only thing I've gone out for this month that I know's already been cast was the Biaxin print ad.

So something seems to be going right. I just need it to go a little bit right-er and start booking some nationals. And that's definitely do-able.

The Velveeta callback was on Monday, and seemed to go well. Rightly or wrongly, I perceive that one as both the "biggie" of the recent batch, and the one I have the best crack at (I was disappointed with how the Sprint "Sockman" one went, but am still holding out hope).

I also felt good about one for Disney�though that's non-union, so it wouldn't be a big payday. A high- visibility spot, though�and was surprised to get a callback for a thing called "Fit TV" that I thought hadn't gone well at all (That's on Monday morning).

I can tell I'm feeling more hopeful again because I'm starting to fantasize about having extra money. But the fantasies are not about laptops and motorcycles and mini-coopers; I'm thinking about things like having a cell phone again, or getting cable (I think cable is going to become increasingly important the more I start booking gigs). Thinking about being able to open a saving account, or take some ongoing acting classes, or buy a couple of suits.

And I'm thinking about my future, when I'll be a full-time actor. Looking for acting stuff in the daytime, while I do plays at night. Remembering Borders fondly as something in my past.

All that stuff is good, and not at all out of the realm of possibility. But I feel like this period of time is very dangerous for me, with a number of potential pitfalls.

Boiling it all down, I think a big "issue" for me is going to be "regulating my moods"; Not getting too down-in-the-dumps when things are slow, but by the same token, not getting too excited over any given upturn in my fortunes (I have a good grip on why letting myself get overly depressed is bad, but getting overly excited about callbacks, or booking gigs, or getting my SAG card, or whatever, isn't a good thing either; it will only lead to disappointment when things either return to "normal", or I realize that, even with a national commercial, SAG card, and what-have-you, life will still have its little peaks and valleys).

(2:15 p.m.)

Finally saw George of the Jungle II (The movie starring my friend Chris Showerman). The dvd is resting on my tv table even now.

All-in-all, I thought the movie was pretty bad; yes, it's a kid's movie, but the best kid's entertainment, in my mind, is just good entertainment period (ex. Looney Tunes, ET, the Harry Potter books, Charlotte's Web, etc), and "George" did not pass muster in that department. It wasn't particularly funny, and was obviously done on the cheap.

But I thought Chris came off fine. He looked great, obviously--He started lifted weights when he was still in single digits, and it's paid off big-time!--and as "George", he was appropriately dumb/innocent, projecting what Chris projects in real life, which is a basic "nice guy"-ness that makes you automatically like him.

It'll be interesting to see where things go for Chris from here...

In the meantime, I've gotta get myself to work.

And dream of bigger, better things...

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