3:23 pm - Friday, Mar. 31, 2006
A military expert commenting on the “debacle” in Iraq.
I don’t know about you, but when the guys who wage war for a living declare Iraq a “debacle”, I tend to believe them.
From a friend’s journal:
I'm sorry to say I can't read my friend Jim's journal any more. I just had to give it up. Too many times it made me feel hopelessly sad for him or irratated (sic) with his outlook. I need to focus on things that cheer me up, not bring me down. I have enough of my own problems to deal with.
Being a sensitive lad–Maybe even an overly-sensitive lad-- I went through some...changes when “Reader X” first emailed me with this decision.
Of my emotional “buttons”, maybe the biggest is my fear that if you really knew me, you’d reject me (“Childhood trauma”, blah blah blah, etc. and so forth).
A fear of rejection “if you really knew me”, if you think about it, makes keeping an online journal either 1) really brave, or 2) really masochistic. Or both.
I was initially upset, because I want everyone who reads my journal to keep reading my journal and think I’m a really cool guy and all that, but then it hit me–In the basic scheme of things, who the $@#! cares?
It’s just a journal, after all.
Weds 3/29/06 (11:37 p.m.)
Well, this could hardly have worked out better–today was my day off, I had nothing particularly compelling to do...then Mark and Jane’s video “care package” came in the mail (With the first two episodes of The Sopranos and Big Love, the new HBO show starring Bill Paxton as a Utah polygamist with three wives).
I am so going to miss The Sopranos when it’s gone. As an actor, I feel like if I ever get to be part of something that good...well, I was going to say, “...then my life won’t have been a complete waste”, but that seemed a little harsh; let’s just say, “If I ever get to be part of something that good...I’ll be very happy”, and leave it at that.
And I was instantly hooked on Big Love. And I have a feeling it’s going to get better as it goes along, and “finds its footing”.
Seeing the two shows back-to-back, I thought about how, even though the settings could hardly be more different, they have some similarities–They both concern a “family man” dealing with the pressures of “an alternative lifestyle” (A “lifestyle” that, in both cases, could get them into legal hot water). They both have unusual “extended families”, if you will.
Thurs 3/31/06 (2:24 p.m.)
Just got off the phone with Cary a short time ago.
Which is good news for me.
Happy to read about Jill Carroll’s release from captivity.
It’s kind of mysterious–The White House is denying doing anything, the State Department is denying doing anything, and Jill Carroll herself doesn’t know why they released her.
But in any case, it’s good news in a place where good news is hard to come by.
Checked my bank balance online a couple days ago, and was happily surprised to see that my tax refund has already been directly deposited.
That means the rent will be no problem for the next month or two.
Of course, being who I am, I almost immediately went from enjoying my temporarily inflated bank balance, to worrying about what I’m going to do come June.
But for now, the rent is paid, creditors are being assuaged, and a visit to the grocery store doesn’t make my stomach hurt from stress.
And that’s a good thing.
And I’m past due for booking a commercial or co-star role or something, so we’ll just plan on that happening between now and then.
Submitted for two tv shows today, both shows I really, really like–Grey’s Anatomy and The Shield.
The Grey’s Anatomy part wasn’t very descriptive–Just the character name “Jim”, who is “the father of a patient”–but of course, getting on that show in any capacity would be cool.
But the Shield role amused me as I read it–The part is “Axl”, the owner/operator of a porn shop, who makes “grandmother” porn movies on the side, starring himself and various old ladies (His big scene is getting beaten up by someone who isn’t too happy when they see “Granny” in a compromising position).
This sort of proves what I’ve said about casting on The Shield: If you’re a middle-aged white guy, and you’re not playing a cop, you’re probably going to be a rapist or pedophile or some other type of sexual deviant.
Anyway, the idea of playing this role...well, it makes me want to laugh just thinking about it.
And since I don’t think I’m going to top the idea of me as “niche-market porn star", I’m going to wrap this up, and try to get in my pre-work, tired middle-aged guy nap.
Nitey-nite, sports fans...
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