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8:51 am - Sat 5.10.2008
How Come I Can't Have A Life AND A Job?

How Come I Can't Have A Life AND A Job?

I hate to keep harping on the availability issue at ArcLight - I imagine you're tired of reading about it (And I'm tired of writing about it) - but it's really plaguing my thoughts, and I just can't let it go.

After two weeks of no changes, the schedule is now affecting my ability to do...basically everything I do outside of work.

I had to cancel this past week's therapy session to be able to do something with Cary on Wednesday (Because it was the only day I had off; my therapy sessions are Wednesdays @ 7:00 p.m.). And this coming week, I'm working on Wednesday. And my therapist's schedule is so tight that all he can do is see if someone else would be willing to switch appointment times with me (If not, I'm S.O.L.).

I'm working during the day on Sunday (from 10:15-6:00), so I can't go to my regular 11:00 a.m. Weight Watchers meeting; I'll have to either go at 7:30 a.m. (If I want to weigh-in, then stay for the meeting), which is very unlikely, or else just weigh-in before the next meeting at 9:30, and go to work from there.

And I'm enough of a wimp about conflict, and afraid enough of losing my job (In spite of all my railing against ArcLight), that it was a week into the month before I emailed Molly with a list of May workshops I wanted to attend at ACG (I don't typically procrastinate like that about workshops; for one thing, I like doing them, and for another, I'm afraid that if I wait, they'll fill up). Clearly, I was afraid to commit to workshops, with the potential now for work conflicts.

I don't have much of a life outside of work, so it really bothers me that what little life I do have is now being sacrificed on the altar of my shitty job.

And the idea that I'd even think about forgoing workshops (Which I enjoy doing, which keep me "sharp", and which are still important for my career), really bothers me.

Adding a level of complexity to my work/life dilemma is that we're in the summer "blackout period" at work; we can request a given shift off (But good luck with that, when you're competing with a couple hundred fellow co-workers to get first crack at the schedule book), but you can't request any full days off.

The other options are to try to get other people to work for you (More difficult for me than for some people, because I do a couple things - Usher Greeting and Guest Services in particular - that most people aren't trained to do), and lose a day's money, or just call out...and lose a day's money, and begin the process of becoming a "problem" and, sooner or later, getting fired (Or "de-selected", in ArcLight-speak).

But speaking of ArcLight...

It's time for me to go.


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