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9:49 AM - Sun 10.08.23
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Papa's Got A Brand New (Mixed) Bag

(As I begin, I'm listening to a Sunday YouTube show called "Theist Helpline/Philosophy Kindergarten" - I don't think I can listen and write at the same time, so I guess this is a science experiment...)

Got home from New Mexico Wednesday afternoon...

Disappointingly, the trip was a decidedly mixed bag.

On the good side, the 50-60-person audience at AFMX was quite taken with the film. I continue to be amazed at how many people thank us for the film as if we did it as a personal favor to them (Which suggests Jane was right in thinking that, as different as my life has been from most people, there would be a lot in the film for audiences to relate to).

Also, the organizers and volunteers were very nice - Jane has attended some film festivals where the filmmakers seem like an afterthought, so she's particularly appreciative when the festival people actually seem to like you and be glad you're there.

And there were a number of nice meals - Whether eating at M'Toochi's (sp?) with Dick and Jane and a gang of their friends after the screening (Then eating there again on Sunday with a friend of Jane's), having Dick's homemade mac-and-cheese while in Santa Fe, or having lunch with Jane at the Plaza Cafe (Enjoying Haagen-Daz and window shopping afterward).

I also enjoyed the free breakfasts at the hotel - That always feels like "gracious living" to me.

(And I don't know that I'd put this on the "good" side, but at least on the "interesting side", after our post-screening meal at M'Toochi's, Jane and I were going to attend a mixer down the street, but the festivities were dampened a bit by a murder across the street from the theater - There were over a dozen police vehicles and the street was cordoned off in the direction we needed to go to get back to the hotel, making it necessary for Jane to call Dick, who had to perform some automotive gymnastics to get us back to the hotel before heading back to Santa Fe himself.)

On the less-good side, we didn't get anywhere in the neighborhood of winning any awards (Not strictly necessary, mind you, but nice when it happens. And I imagine, when trying to get someone to distribute your film, it doesn't hurt if you can point to a boatload of film festival awards as a marker of its appeal).

And during the festival, Jane and I had one of our - in my mind, anyway - very rare fights, as an attempt to be funny on my part went spectacularly wrong (I know the majority of people don't exactly enjoy fighting with the people they care about, but I feel like, with my background, I always take it particularly hard).

Then with Dick having severe back issues - He's moving very slow and is in near-constant pain - and Jane taking ill, it was hard not to feel I was imposing when the festival was over and I was staying with them in Santa Fe (The festival had been in Albuquerque, and Jane and I stayed there while the festival was going on).

And while I was away, after months of inactivity on the acting front in LA, I missed, not one, not two, not three, but four commercial auditions (It almost got funny after a time. Almost).

There were a few other not-good things, but I think you get the idea - I prefer when a film festival experience/trip out-of-town is entirely positive, and this... was not that.

But life goes on.

For now.

I always get a little depressed when coming back to LA, feeling like I'm going from being kind of a "big deal" back to being a nobody.

But happily, this time around, instead of having nothing to do and no one to talk to, I went back to GenSpace on Thursday, picketed with Josh on Friday, and had "festival stuff" to do with Jane yesterday (We did a Zoom interview for the upcoming La Femme Film Festival earlier in the day, then in the evening, we addressed the audience by phone for the screening in Eau Claire WI - I opened the screening, and Jane did the Q&A afterward).

And I've drawn a couple pictures.

And now I've done this.

And to my delight, after missing out on all those auditions, I actually have an audition tomorrow afternoon - As you might imagine, I was expecting the "audition window" to slam shut the moment I hit the LA city limits, so this was a happy surprise.

And the "happy surprise" of an audition seems a perfectly good note to close on, so "close" I shall.

(Till next time...)


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