8:45 AM - Thurs 10.27.22
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(Just read my last entry, to see where I left off...)

Got back from Santa Fe on Tuesday.

(But more on Santa Fe in a bit...)

Happily, the commercial I booked recently shot a week ago Tuesday, allowing me to go to SF without any problems (I'd worried about having to cancel/reschedule my flight).

There was a combination fitting and rehearsal the day before ("Rehearsal" because the commercial involved singing and dancing...or what would more appropriately be called "movement", in my case).

And while the fitting part went fine - they had my "look", and an alternate choice, together pretty quickly - the rehearsal kind of messed me up.

(I didn't know there was going to be dancing, because there hadn't been at the audition - Turned out, they'd had additional auditions for "dancers". And while I'd say I move pretty well for a 250 lbs-plus 61-year-old...I'm a 250 lbs-plus 61-year-old.)

At day's-end - which was about six hours (Not all rehearsal, but still...) - my left hip and right knee were hurting enough that I was very worried about holding up through the actual shoot.

But happily, they'd whittled my minimal "dancing" down to some very basic movement - I still found it taxing over the course of hours, but I could do it - and I got through the 11-hours-plus shoot with hip and knee relatively intact.

The shoot was tiring - we had a very early call, and there's not really anything I want to do for 11 hours these days - but overall, pretty fun.

The production folks were quite nice (I was impressed when we went to lunch, and a crew member thanked the six of us in the spot for never flagging, hitting each take full-throttle. And while we were shooting, doing a zillion takes of one particular sequence, the Director made a point of telling us we were doing great, that the problems were happening on their end. Which is nice to hear when you're doing something over and over, with no idea why).

And my fellow actors were lovely.

I was probably a good twenty years older than the next youngest person - something I'm gonna have to get used to - but it was clear we were a "team". And as one person put it, during breaks in the action, we were "talking to each other instead of retreating to our phones" (I couldn't have "retreated to my phone" if I'd wanted to, since it was dead by early afternoon - Jane R. often chides me for leaving a million apps open on my phone, which is something I'm now working on).

After some ADR tomorrow morning (recording the singing for the spot), all that will remain is to wait for the spot to start airing - It's a holiday spot, so while it won't air forever, it'll hopefully air a lot - and then, hopefully, to collect a tasty check or two for my efforts.

And the time there was lovely (At one point, I thought, "This feels like a vacation...", even though I have nothing to be vacationing from at this point).

But it ended up being something of a "working vacation" - While I was there, I had two voiceover auditions and a self-tape for a "possible recurring" on a Fox comedy (More on that last thing in a bit) - though I didn't really mind. I'm glad we're now in an era where you don't necessarily have to miss out on auditions because you're out of town. Makes going out of town a little less stressful).

Our sold-out screening was on Sunday afternoon.

As was the case at Awareness Festival here in LA, I felt like Jane and I were listening to the audience way more than watching the film (We both particularly enjoyed a woman sitting in front of us having a lot of little "exclamations" throughout the film).

As with Awareness, the film was very well-received (And I was happy that, unlike Awareness, where they turned off the credit music mid-stream, the Santa Fe people let it mostly play, then faded it out before the Q&A - Jane and I danced and got a lot of the crowd dancing with us, which was cool).

And I thought the Q&A was our best so far (There have been three) - The questions were good and I feel like we've already improved in terms of being a "team" while we're on stage (And we were pretty good from the get-go).

(Jane's done this before and I have not, so I was a little nervous before we started doing it. But I'm an actor, I'm not uncomfortable in front of people, and I can be pretty funny off-the-cuff...and if I'm not the expert in how I feel about being the subject of a documentary and answering questions about my life, who is? One thing I would say is that I could stand to "tighten up" my answers, but I'm sure that'll happen over time.)

Afterward, we went to Del Charro (Or as I first mistakenly called it, "The High Chapperal"), with Dick and a dozen or so of their friends, where great fun was had (And where I was recognized by a Shameless fan, which is something Jane always enjoys).

But the whole thing was great fun, start to finish - whether breakfasting with Jane at "her office" to hanging out at home with her and Dick, to having dinner with their friends Tom and Carol.

And of course, screening the film to great effect (And we won our second award in two outings - "Best New Mexico Feature Documentary").

The only caveat? Dick isn't fond of big heating bills, so their home, while otherwise very inviting, is frosty cold.

But for all the fun, it feels a small price to pay...

This was a bigger deal than most of my auditions because it was a "possible recurring", so it was pretty thrilling when, around 24 hours after we shot it, I got word that Casting was sending my audition to Producers.

The only "down-side" was that, if I booked it, I was probably done with film festivals for the rest of the year (Which really would be a down-side - the two we've done have been really fun, and I'd be sad to miss out on the others - but it would be a price I'd be willing to pay).

Of course, waiting to hear whether I'd booked it or not wasn't enough tension, so its shoot dates had to conflict with the ADR session for the commercial.

So I wondered and worried in the days after the screening.

And when I left early Tuesday afternoon, I still didn't know what the deal was.

Then a tragedy happened with one of the cast members on the show, and the show was now going on an indefinite hiatus.

And I was "released from my pin", which typically means, "We didn't pick you".

But in this instance, I was confused, wondering if it meant, "We're not shooting next week and don't know when we'll resume shooting, so we don't have a shoot date to pin you for".

In other words, I thought the role could still possibly be in play.

But it wasn't.

They didn't pick me.

Which was very disappointing, don't get me wrong - I stress about work all the time, so to have a potential semi-regular job would be nice - but I wasn't devastated.

When I was pinned, I told myself that, while getting it would be good, just getting the pin was good - In my mind, it shows Casting, and my Agent, that I'm a "contender", and that means they'll likely look at me for other things/be more motivated to find me something good.

But more to the point, while it would have been better than my current situation, it's not really what I want.

In a word, I want more.

And hopefully, this frees me up to get more.

I guess time will tell.

(Till next time...)

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