9:20 am - Sun 5/6/07
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Sat 5/5/07 (3:00 p.m.)

Today�s AMG meeting has been cancelled (Only three of us could make it) so happily, that means I have some extra time to do this...

There�s a lot to write about, but I�m going to try and keep things as concise as possible.

Long story short, my nose is really screwed-up structurally (This in spite of a deviated septum �repair� performed back in the mid-90s). The way the doctor described it is that I�m basically �trying to breathe through a couple of pin-holes�.
(He had very...unkind things to say about Dr Mayhew, my ENT guy back in Lansing, who performed the aforementioned septoplasty.)

In additional to bone and cartilage not being where they�re supposed to be, I also have allergies (Hence, the �allergic shiners� I�ve had since childhood). So between the structural mess of my nasal passages, and the allergies, Dr S. said it�s no wonder, after being diagnosed with sleep apnea, that I was never able to make the CPAP machine work out (I was there to figure out how to breathe better, and to either be able to tolerate the CPAP, or�better yet�not need it. And if I could get rid of the dark circles under my eyes in the process, that would be good too).

The good news, such as it was? My mouth/throat is not that bad. My uvula is on the long side (Of all the long body parts to have, I get the uvula!), and I could stand to have more space for things, but he said those were comparatively minor issues.

Which makes me wonder about the whole �sleep apnea� thing (I thought that was about your throat closing off at night, not about being unable to breathe through your nose. But I�m no expert on sleep apnea, even though I should be at this point).

In any case, Dr S. recommended some test I can�t remember the name of now, and another sleep study, before proceeding with my treatment. So those recommendations have to go back to QueensCare, since they�re footing the bill at this point, and we�ll see what they have to say (If they can�t help me out from here, I�ll be eligible for SAG insurance at some point this year, so one way or another, I can probably get done whatever I need to get done).

I�m not 100% nuts about another surgery, but I�ll tell you, if this gets me to the promised land of actually being able to sleep at night, I say �bring on the scalpel!�.

We met on Wednesday, at a coffeehouse in Studio City, and talked for about an hour.

My take on it? Things seemed very cordial, and positive, and I�d actually be surprised if, when I call her back in a week, she doesn�t agree to take me on as a client (Though I don�t want to �get ahead of myself� here).

I did a good job of playing up my �positives��that I�ve booked three gigs in basically a handful of auditions, that I�ve done a load of casting workshops, that I�m confident I can book if/when given the opportunity, etc.�and on her part, she made it sound like, while it takes time, and theatrical stuff comes more slowly than commercials, that there was definitely money to be made out there for a �quirky� character-type like me.

So we�ll see. Think a good thought for me on this coming through. As I�ve said before, I don�t want to make too much of it, but at the same time, it has the potential to be a really big �step in the right direction�.

When Brett started up PMG towards the end of last year, he told me he saw it as a �transitional� thing, for people who didn�t have a theatrical agent or manager, on their way to getting a theatrical agent or manager. It would be a way for actors to go out who weren�t going out.

Anyway, thus far, Brett/PMG hasn�t really �managed� anything, in terms of my career. He�s acted more as a quasi-theatrical agent, submitting me for things, taking calls, and scheduling auditions. And when I booked Nip/Tuck as a result of one of those auditions, I gave him 15% (Standard for a �manager�, but not for an �agent�).

But during our conversation at Dennys yesterday, Brett said he wants to �streamline� things�go down to 20 clients (from about 40 right now), drop the �submission service� (He�s been charging some people a monthly fee for submitting them), etc�and to basically become a real manager (To coordinate with agents, talk to casting people and network types, offer general career advice/assistance, etc.)

And he wants a chunk of my commercial money.

And I�m not...comfortable with that.

To my way of thinking, while I�m grateful to Brett for ACG�the workshops through which I booked House and Gilmore Girls�and for taking me on with PMG (And getting me the Nip/Tuck audition, amongst others), he�s had nothing to do with any commercial success I�m having, so why should he get any of that money? If he were going to act as a go-between between me and JS, or help JS get me more commercial auditions, that would be one thing, but (And I talked to JS about this yesterday, after talking to Brett), I don�t need a �go-between� with JS, and JS doesn�t need Brett�s help in getting me more commercial auditions (We�re doing okay at this point).

So I don�t know how things are going to proceed at this point (The way things were left with Brett is that he�s going to �get back to me� after I�ve �thought it over� for awhile). Maybe Vicki will take me on, she�ll be really effective, and I won�t need Brett (Though I think it couldn�t hurt to have two people out there pitching for me). Or maybe I�ll offer Brett 15% of any theatrical earnings�since he�d be functioning as my theatrical manager--and he�ll decide that 15% of theatrical is better than nothing (Cause after all, he told me yesterday that he sees me being a character guy that �works all the time�. And if he really believes that, seems he�d want to be �on board�, whether or not commercial money�s in the picture).

I�m in new territory here, and I�m not really sure how to work my way through it. I guess I just have to �check myself�, see what feels right, and go with it. What else can I do...?

(There�s a lot more I could say about this�there�s a lot more I could say about a lot of things right now�but I said I was going to be �concise�, so even if it�s too late for that, I�m going to start �wrapping up�...)

All this stuff I�ve written about makes me more than a little anxious, but at the same time, it�s all stuff that has a potentially huge �upside�.

So here�s what�s going to happen:

1) I�m going to be able to pay, one way or another, for any surgery/treatment Dr S. suggests, it�s going to work, my recovery time is going to be quick and relatively easy, and it�s going to make a huge, life-changing difference in my breathing/sleeping (And the dark circles under my eyes are going to be a thing of the past).

2) Vicki L. is going to take me on, she�s going to be a great agent, and it�s going to kick my career up to the next level.

3) And Brett is going to agree to my terms, turn out to be a great manager, and make my life/career much easier.

And now with all that figured out, I think I�m going to take a nap.

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