10:04 am - Mon 8.18.2008
Weight Watchers #41

Well, this week's weigh-in went beyond "good", to a result bordering on shocking - I lost 4.6 lbs this past week.

It's my second-best weigh-in ever (My best - 6 lbs - was after my first week on the program).

Twenty-four hours later, I'm still trying to figure out what happened, what was so radically different about this past week (And I'm actually feeling a little suspicious - Lynn, the meeting leader, joked once, "Can't we fudge the scale for him a little bit?" - but I'm pretty sure no one would actually put their job at risk just so I can start working at Weight Watchers a month early...would they?).

(Some more perspective - Before yesterday, the best weigh-in I'd had in the past five months was 3 lbs, back in May; you have to go back to November, my first full month in the program, to find my only other weigh-ins that cracked 4 lbs.)

So I was very surprised when I got on the scale yesterday - I was expecting to get a lb or two, not what I got - and to be honest, I'm kind of unnerved by it.

This monster weight-loss has put me, in one fell swoop, where I thought I wouldn't be for at least three weeks or a month or longer - eligible to start working at Weight Watchers (I needed to be 205 lbs, within ten lbs of my 195 lb goal weight; yesterday's weigh-in put me at 204.8 lbs).

Last night I emailed Sherry Greene, the WW territory manager (And my potential new boss), to basically say, "If you want me, I'm ready to hop on board".

(Haven't heard from her yet - Can't imagine I'm her #1 priority - but am hoping I will within the next day or two.)

To be honest, I'd rather not have to work a straight job, period. But I have to do something - acting just ain't happening right now, and I can't live on sunshine.

And as I've said before, as regular jobs go, I think working at WW has the potential to be a better gig than either Borders or ArcLight (I think/hope it'll be more conducive to acting/auditioning, and I know it'll be more conducive to having a social life. And helping people look better and feel better, and feel better about themselves in the process, is probably not the worst way to make your money).

But whatever the pluses, right now the idea makes me anxious and - frankly - unhappy; Other than the continued frustration of not acting as much as I'd like - or at all, really - I'm probably more comfortable with my life these days than any time since I moved out here (And I know working at Weight Watchers will inevitably lead to more conflict with auditions, gigs, workshops, and, down the road, my desire to start doing theater again).

The only thing that would make me feel more anxious and unhappy than starting at Weight Watchers would be if they don't want me.

If that happens - if the online questionnaire I did recently sends up so many red flags Sherry re-thinks her initial good impression of me - well, then things really get interesting...

But before I lose myself in anxiety and fear, I guess I should close by patting myself on the back - I've now lost over 63 lbs, and have less than ten to go to get to my goal.

And I weigh less than I have in at least the past 10 or 15 years.

Whatever else happens, or fails to happen, that's a good thing.

A very good thing indeed.

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