11:43 pm - Monday, Jan. 28, 2008
When first thinking about this entry, I was tempted to leave it at "I don't want to talk about it...".
Not a pretty week in weight-loss land; Javier warned me this might happen at some point, but I still wasn't expecting, when I got on the scale at yesterday's WW meeting, to have actually gained weight.
(2.2 lbs, to be exact.)
I was so bummed I didn't even stay for the meeting ("Bummed" doesn't really cover it; I left because I was afraid I was going to bust out crying, I was so upset. I didn't trust myself to be able to sit through the meeting without having some kind of emotional outburst, which would have been embarrassing for me and, in all likelihood, frightening for my fellow Weight-Watchers).
Obviously, my emotional response to the situation was pretty out-of-whack, but that's the response I had.
Welcome to my world...
(It leaves me wondering, not for the first time, if "out-of-whack" emotional responses to things like this is why, up till now, I've created such a dull, un-challenging life for myself. Anyway...)
I went back home, and in probably less than an hour, was able to get ahold of myself; yes, gaining weight when you're trying to lose weight is disappointing, but it's a very minor, very temporary setback, and doesn't mean anything in the long-term.
I'm still down 31 lbs, and that's nothing to sneeze at.
And down the road, when I'm looking sharp at 195 lbs, I'll look back at this week, when I wanted to kill myself over 2 lbs, and (I hope) have a good laugh.
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