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12:19 pm - Fri 8/20/04
Blue Monday

Blue Monday

I almost feel like the title says it all...

Tired. Depressed. Etc and so forth, blah blah blah (I should just create a "form entry" for when I'm tired, depressed, and generally out-of-sorts. I'm in that state so often it seems like it would save a lot of time).

At this point, I'm about 99.9% certain I didn't get the "Incredible" videogame commercial.

I'm actually more disappointed about not getting the callback than anything else. After all, it's a hundred-to-one you're actually going to book the gig, but I've been telling myself lately that the one thing I can count on is that if I do well at the initial audition, I'll at least get a callback (Up till this audition, it had been fairly consistent--If I felt good about what I'd done at the first audition, I'd be getting a callback).

Obviously, I need to continue to work on "embracing uncertainty"...

But there is a potential "silver lining" in this dark cloud; the company making the commercial had all the actors coming in sign releases, to possibly use their audition footage in a little "making of the commercial" movie on their website.

So, since I seem to be all about "consolation prizes" these days, maybe I'll luck out and get a $500 "consolation prize" on this one. That would be nice...

The annual JS Represents get-together is this Sunday.

While I'm feeling a little bit of anxiety--My last "social outing" didn't go nearly as well as I'd hoped--there's reason to feel more optimistic about this one:

1) It's at Pan-Pacific Park on 3rd street, basically mid-way between my apartment and work. I can ride my bike, take the bus, or even walk if I'm feeling particularly energetic that day.

2) I'll know JS, of course, but I'll also know some other people from karaoke.

3) It's in a large, open space.

4) There's not going to be any "business" conducted at this get-together--Unlike last year--so you can come and go whenever you want.

5) If I feel awkward, there'll always be acting stuff to talk about (A big question I'd want to ask my fellow JS'ers would be "Is anyone working out the whole auditioning/taking classes/ working thing?". Cause I'm three years down the road here, and I could definitely use some tips).

6) And if, for whatever reason, it really sucks to be there, it's a hop, skip, and a jump right over to the Grove, where I could see a movie.

Speaking of movies, I certainly can't say I've been starved for entertainment lately...

At the movies, I've seen Collateral and Garden State, and on video, I've recently rented The Station Agent, City of God, and Bad Santa.

That's a lot of movie-watching, so I won't bore you with long-winded descriptions of plot and all that horseshit. I'll just say that while I enjoyed all these films--And who knows? You might too--my guess is that my average reader (If there is such a thing) would probably most enjoy Garden State and The Station Agent.

(I think some people would find Collateral and City of God too violent and upsetting, while others would just not be amused by the language and vulgarity of Bad Santa.)

In addition to all the film-watching, "Kookla" sent me a videotape of Dinner For Five episodes (Topped off with The Brini Maxwell Show and the old sci-fi movie Forbidden Planet), and Jane sent me my latest "Six Feet Under" fix.

As you might imagine, as I watched "Dinner", I thought to myself, "I want to be having dinner with Jon Favreau and his celebrity guests...!".

Watching "Brini Maxwell", which I had never even heard of before (Basically, "Brini" is a transvestite Marha Stewart. Or is that redundant?), I was struck by the fact that it didn't strike me as all that strange.

(And as I told "Kookla" in a recent email, I'm comfortable enough in my sexuality to say it--"Brini" is way better-looking then Martha!)

Enjoyed my latest installment of "6 Feet", because, with the exception of Nate (And I guess by extension, Brenda), I'm very "emotionally involved" in everyone's individual plotlines. Like any good soap opera--and "6 Feet" is basically a well-acted, well-written soap--I'm on pins and needles, anxious to see how the various little storylines are going to play out--"Is Claire going to come out, or is this just a phase?", "When is Ruth going to kick George to the curb?", "How is David going to cope with his trauma?", etc.

Nate, who used to be a lot of fun on the show--He was the character who was there to stick a pin in everyone else's pretensions--has become a serious dud of a character.

First, he's down in the dumps over his dysfuntional marriage. Then what's-her-face kills herself, and now he's mooning over this person he never loved in the first place.

It may be realistic, but it sure ain't "fun", or "interesting", or anything else I associate with being entertained.

And in conclusion...

Jimmy did a good thing recently--I finally went back to that "Sleep Apnea" website, which has a list of dentists across the country who fit people for the anti-snoring dental appliance, and emailed three or four here in L.A. (That seemed easier than calling--for me anyway--but it's been over 24 hours with no responses, so I'm thinking I may have to call them all anyway).

Not sure why it's taken me so long to get in gear on this--actually, I do know why it's taken me so long to "get in gear" on this, but it's a subject for another entry--but I will finish out this entry by saying "Good for you, Jim! Slowly but surely, you're making an effort to help yourself".

And with that, I am outta here...


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