Get your own
 diary at! contact me older entries newest entry

10:12 am - Sun 2/29/04
Bill Maher on Gay Marriage

Bill Maher On Gay Marriage

(Jane sent me this email some time back, and before I deleted it, I wanted to pass it on to you. I'm not always in agreement with everything Bill Maher has to say, but on this subject, he's saying everything I'd say, only funnier.)

Subject: Bill Maher on Marriage

This was Bill Maher's Valentine's Day show-ending rant last Saturday night:

"You can't claim you're the party of smaller government

and then make laws about love. On this Valentine's

day, let's stop and ask ourselves, "What business is

it of the state how consenting adults choose to pair

off, share expenses, and eventually stop having sex

with each other?"

"And why does the Bush administration want a

constitutional amendment about weddings? Hey, why stop

at weddings? Birthdays are important; let's put them

in the great document. Let's make a law that gay

people can have birthdays, but straight people get

more cake. You know, to send the right message to

kids.Republicans are always saying we should privatize

things like schools, prisons, social security -- hey,

how about we privatize privacy! Because if the

government forbids gay men from tying the knot, what

is their alternative? They can't all marry Liza


"You know, the Republicans used to be the party that

opposed social engineering, but now they push programs

to outlaw marriage for some people and encourage it

for others. If you're straight, there's $1.5 billion

in the budget to promote marriage, but gay marriage is

opposed because it threatens or mocks or does

something to the sanctity of marriage, as if anything

you can do in Vegas drunk off your ass in front of an

Elvis impersonator could be considered sacred.

"Half the people who pledge eternal love are doing it

because one of them is either knocked up, rich or

desperate. But in George Bush's mind, marriage is only

a beautiful lifetime bond of love and sharing, kind of

like what his dad has with the Saudis.

"But at least the right wing aren't hypocrites on this

issue. They really believe that homosexuality is an

abomination and a dysfunction that's curable. They

believe that if a gay man just devotes his life to

Jesus, he'll stop being gay, because that worked out

so well with the Catholic priests.

"But I have to tell you that the greater shame in this

story goes to the Democrats because they don't believe

homosexuality is an abomination, and, therefore, their

refusal to endorse gay marriage is hypocrisy. Their

position doesn't come from the Bible; it's ripped

right from the latest poll which says that most

Americans are against gay marriage. Well, you know

what? Sometimes most Americans are just wrong, and

where is the Democrat who will stand up and go beyond

the half-measures of civil union and

hate-the-sin-love-the-sinner and say loud and clear,

"There is no sin. It's not an abomination and no one

can control how cupid aims his arrows, and the ones

who pretend they can usually turn out to be the

biggest freaks."

"The law in this country should reflect that some

people are just born one-hundred-percent outrageously,

fabulously, undeniably Fire-Island gay. And they do

not need re-programming -- they need a man with a slow



previous - next

2 comments so far
about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at!